WHAT ARE WE SCARED OF?

OKAY, I AM GOING TO DO THIS FIRST PART OF MY BLOG IN BOLD, CAPPED WORDING BECAUSE I WANT TO CATCH YOUR ATTENTION IN A BIGGER WAY. I HAVE HAD SUCH A PROFOUND THOUGHT TODAY AND THIS THOUGHT MAY SOLVE ALL OF OUR PROBLEMS IN LIFE. DO YOU WANT TO HEAR IT? I SAID...DO YOU WANT TO HEAR IT?? OK, WELL, I AM GOING TO TELL YOU ANYWAYS. MY THOUGHT WAS IF THERE WAS ONE THING IN LIFE I HATE? AND THERE IS, I HATE THE FACT I WORRY HOW LONG, IS HOW LONG? HOW LONG AM I GOING TO WORRY ABOUT "WHAT IF I CAN'T?, WHAT IF DO THIS WRONG/RIGHT?, I WONDER HOW IT WILL FEEL? I WONDER ETC... SO WONDER THIS: WHAT IF YOU KNOW THAT GOD HAS GIVEN US ALL THE RESOURCES TO DO WHATEVER WE WANT TO; AND WHAT IF WE CAN'T LIVE LIKE THIS PERSON, OR DO THIS OR THAT AS GOOD AS WHATEVER PERSON WHAT IS GOING TO HAPPEN? WELL LOOK AT IT LIKE THIS. IF THOSE PEOPLE WHO YOU PUT AT THE PEDESTAL OF WHAT YOU WANT TO ACHIEVE CAN DO IT...WHY CAN'T U? OBVIOUSLY THEY CAN DO IT SO YOU CAN TOO. SO DO IT. THAT'S IT PERIOD. IT IS NOT IF WHAT IF I CAN'T? IT IS WHY DON'T I? BECAUSE IF THE NEXT PERSON CAN DO ONE THING THEN I CAN DO IT TOO. I AM NOT ARROGANT, BUT I BELIEVE WE CAN ALL DO THE OPPOSITE OF WHAT WE THINK WE CAN'T DO. WHY CAN'T WE ALL BELIEVE THAT TOO? OK SO LAST QUESTION OF THE NIGHT THAT WILL SOLVE ALL QUESTIONS...WHY DON'T WE STOP QUESTIONING WHY WE DON'T DO SOMETHING, SO WE WILL NOT HAVE TO QUESTION THE FOLLOWING WHAT IF'S? GOODNIGHT

Scared Straight? or..Scared Stiff?

Hey everyone, today was one of those days for me where I was faced with thoughts from my past. For me, this is hard, I believe it is for most people. This topic is difficult for me, I usually shed a tear or two when I reminisce of some old memories. I felt the need to blog about this because, I have learned that the only way to move forward is, not to settle in your ways. Being scared straight is what saved me today. For the longest time I was scared stiff, so stiff that I could not break the horrible cycle of my short comings in life. From day one I said my blogs would be about real stuff, real life, so I am getting so real I am making myself bare for you. I am taking you to a place inside myself so deep that you will feel like you have just taken a personal tour of my soul. When I was 15 I was raped. I know your probably thinking, "damn that's sad," or "what I am supposed to say, or think about that?" Well don't think anything about it, because I don't think anything about it too much anymore. For so long I used that as an excuse to be blank. Not to feel, not to grow, not to further myself. I was frozen in time mentally. Then I got tired, I got tired of not progressing. I grew weary of being scared, which means I wasn't really scared anymore. Life goes on, which means, either I had to move on also, or get left behind. Between then, and now a lot has happened; good and bad. I believe in leaving things on a good note so I will start with the bad, and follow with the good. The bad things are, I have been diagnosed with epilepsy(a seizure disorder), I've stolen, and had to deal with the consequences, I've had to rethink my steps in life and start all over again, I've overdosed on medication, I would go through times when I could never even believe in a better tomorrow. There is so much more I could say about the bad but the bad does not even compare to the good. The good is that I am still alive, I have a beautiful daughter, the Lord is still my Savior, my family has and will always stick by me, I am not giving up on my education, I learned how to continue life, & through it all I have sorted out my morals, and realized that I am a great person that can offer a lot to the world, but like everyone I have made bad decisions. I look at it like this, God sent his only son to die so that we all could have a second, third or fourth chance. Jesus did not care what the people had done, He did not care if the hated Him. That is why when I die and if God asks me, " If I took advantage of all the opportunities life had to offer me?" I want to be able to say yes, I took the good with the bad and appreciated them just the same. I got scared straight instead of being scared stiff, and kept going on. I took what I learned and realized where I've been, and where I do not want to go again. There was a time in my life when I did not want anyone to know anything of my past, and now I can put out there in black and white for the world to read. We all have had times we are not proud of, but the only way to learn, and to potentially prevent the next person from experiencing the same things you have is to talk about it. Draw a picture for the world to see of your faults and your beauty. Well, I think I have said a lot to take in, but I must say I do feel better after writing this, and I hope you feel better after reading it.

God Bless,
Jess